Monday, February 24, 2014

Pleasing everyone


I have a hard time with this. I am a people pleaser, and on top of that I worry to much about what people think.

 I waste too much time trying to figure out what people are thinking- ruining myself in the process. Instead of wasting that time trying to figure out what people are thinking, I can be devoting that time to my relationship with God- allowing myself to grow both spiritually and mentally. Until recently, I never realized how much I will alter who I am for other people. These past few months have really opened my eyes to a lot. I thought I understood those saying when people said "enemies? that means you've stood up for what you believe in" or "you can't please everyone, trying to is setting yourself up for failure" but honestly looking back I did not fully understand the meaning behind those quotes. Or maybe it is not that I did not understand, I just did not listen and apply them. Ultimately, either it was because I did not know how or just did not want to make the effort. That being said, I want to make the conscious choice to fully understand the deeper meaning of those sayings/quotes. It is about time. People can go their whole lives trying to please people, but I believe that they are not allowing themselves to reach their ultimate potential. They are stopping themselves from becoming what God has set out for them to be. In other words, they are setting up for a life of unhappiness. I believe t r u e happiness lies with those who have the self-confidence, mental strength, and will power to not only make the choices needed to become the best version of themselves they can be, but to carry them out as well. Whether that is waking up 10 minutes earlier to spend alone time with God, adding exercising into their schedule, finding things to laugh at throughout the day, smiling at a stranger, learning that a relationship may no longer be beneficial, learning to let go of something, and ultimately acknowledging and accepting changes in your life. It takes time to figure out exactly what makes you happy and as time passes the things that make you happy will change. I am still trying to figure it all out, heck we all are. And of course we are never going to get it perfectly right, we are not supposed to. That is the beauty of our relationship with God.He knows what he is doing and He ultimately has our best interest, we just have to trust that. I have found when I do not worry or stress about the things I cannot control I am able to put that energy toward much more beneficial things. 



Do not alter who you are just to please people or to blend in. It takes true strength to stand up for your morals and values. Hey you will lose some friends in the process, but you have to look at it this way- if they were really your friend they would appreciate you for the real you. So if they do not appreciate the real you, I hate to say it but they were never really a true friend. It is time to start making choices for yourself. At the end of the day you are the only one that has to deal with the choices you make, so you might as well chose what is going to make yourself happy. You just have to be okay with knowing that some of those choices will piss people off, and you will find a lot of people who disagree with the way you life but it is not their life it is yours. 

Yes life is serious but nothing is for certain. At the end of the day make the decisions that will make you happy. The people that accept these choices are your true friends (and obviously family).  Love those people who treat you right (the ones who love you, care about the real you, and accept your choices) and forget about those who don't. No one said life would be easy, they just promised it would be worth it. 
Just to add one of my favorite prayers-
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things that I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. 




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